Tips on Thriving in Your Singleness

 

Hi Loves!

Happy Valentine’s day!  Angel and I thought it would be a cool idea to collaborate together! Angel  runs a website called GodandCulture.com where he shares his views on the world as Christian man, his Instagram and podcast are also super encouraging. If you are looking for a guy after God’s own heart to follow he is a great example. I personally believe it is important to make sure we follow positive influences in our lives and that includes social media.

So with today being Valentines Day we thought it would be a great idea to talk about being single and what that means as a Christian. The world’s idea of single is completely different than what God has for us. First, let me just say it can be difficult to “thrive” in your single season as aChristiann because people in the church are constantly trying to marry you off. Lets just get personal for a second. I have been single for six years. YES, six years. Now some of your jaws may have dropped (I get it all the time) but let me tell you I am happy. I dont feel like I am missing out on something or feel the desire to jump in a relationship out of loneliness or wanting companionship. I am very content being single, like the real kind of content. Not like “yes lord I am so content.” five minutes later “Lord, where is my Adam?”. No, I’m real life totally okay if I am the 2% not meant for marriage. Some of my family members will be upset that I say that but its true. Yes, I dream about my future but I don’t allow that to stop me from living for Christ. Which brings me to my first tip.

Tip One

Don’t allow yourself to get caught in the fairy tale of having a husband. Yes, I dream constantly about my engagement, engagement party, bridal show, bachelorette party, wedding, reception – all of it. I literally have the whole thing planned (including my engagement lol). I want it all but constantly fantasizing about it is a very dangerous. We can make the ‘idea’ of this huge celebration an idol. Yes, things that the Lord wants for us like marriage can be an idol. The purpose of getting married is not so we finally live the fairytale we have dreamt of as little girls but to enter a marriage that will honor God. A marriage that will become our first ministry, which is a lot of hard work and takes up so much time. The things we have time for now as singles will be harder to do when we have to think about someone before ourselves. Which brings me to my next tip.

Tip Two:

Don’t treat your single season as a waiting room. I know that it may seem like people all around us are getting married but there is a misconception that life begins after you say “I Do”. Well, that’s  just not true. You are already living. You have so much more free time when you are single. Use this time to truly grow your relationships you currently have instead of trying to find a new one to add on. Be honest. When is the last time you sat and really read your bible? Like read a few chapters and reflected on them? I’m not talking about at bible study or with a friend but with God just in quiet time. When is the last time you talked your parents/guardians/grandparents?  How are those relationships? What about your friends? Are you a good friend? These are some things to think about before trying to find your Adam. Focus on the relationships God has already placed in your life. Learn to become a better daughter/son and friend. After all, you want your Adam to be your friend right?

Tip Three:

Write your list. No, not for what you want in a husband (I’m sure you already have that) but what qualities you think you should have as a wife. Write things that you need to work at. We all have flaws, so be honest with your list. Once you have it all written out treat it as your todo list. Also be specific this is bettering you as a woman.

Tip Four:

For the day of love, it’s important to remember how loved you are. Valentine’s day can be so hard for woman who are single because people are getting showered with gifts and flowers. We see it all over social media, in the office and at the pizza place when you are just trying to get your heart-shaped pizza to binge watch some Netflix on the couch. I want to encourage you to let God be your Valentine. Read his word and see just how much He loves you. I started a Writing Scripture Challenge centering around love. Write the scriptures out and really feel the love He has for you.

Tip Five:

Go an encourage one of your single friends. As a single I’m sure you have other single friends. I know it may seem like all of our friends are in relationships or getting engaged but truly look around maybe there is a new friend in your life who is single and you just haven’t let them in yet.

Well, that’s all my tips for thriving in your single season! I hope you enjoyed this post and as always I am praying for you:). Don’t forget to check out Angel’s post it is linked right here.

oh and Happy Valentine’s Day šŸ™‚

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